Disclosing your age

Please go visit this comic and support The Oatmeal (aka Matthew Inman). He is rad.

Don’t be a baby about your age

People sometimes tell little white lies in the dating game, both online and offline. However, age is a silly item to lie about, even as you start to get older.

This comic from The Oatmeal (used with permission) illustrates one reason why. When you fail to disclose your actual age, by demurring something like “older than you,” you just sound crazy. Nothing screams insecurity louder, even if it’s not actually something you’re all that insecure about. Realistically, most people sort of look their age, and hemming and hawing about it just makes people guess up the number even higher AND think you’re a weirdo and/or a wuss for not sharing.

If you resort to naming a fake age, you’re bound to get caught. Maybe not with someone you only go on one date with, but definitely with someone you wind up dating for a year. Then, not only is the foundation of your relationship based on a non-teensy lie, but it gets way more awkward the longer you keep up pretenses. Seemingly tiny deceptions like this can make your potential mate wonder what else you’ve been dishonest about.

Lastly, it’s in your best interest to date people who want to date you back just as you are. That means people who like how you look in a recent, realistic photo; who like how you seem based on a thoughtful, well-crafted profile; and who feel that whatever life metadata you’ve chosen to disclose matches up with whatever they’ve chosen to seek out. If you must must MUST be coy about your age, just don’t put anything at all, but answer truthfully if a potential date asks. If they truly don’t want to be with you because of a number, well, aren’t you better off finding better connections? (I can alwayshelp with that part, of course.)

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